Getting Me Through

Life has been moving insanely fast lately. I feel like everything is unorganized and I can’t get my feet underneath me.

This is a quote from Elder Eyring from May’s General Conference that has been getting me through lately:

What a beautiful promise. We became unexpectedly pregnant, found out we’re having twins, and are buying a house, all in the space of 6 months. HOLY COW.

So much change. On top of that, we haven’t been married a year yet. Talk about the fast track.

This isn’t at all how we saw our future. We had discussed maybe starting to TRY for a baby in August. We were looking at becoming parents in a little less than 2 years. We were supposed to go home to Saudi for Christmas, so Trevor could see where I grew up. We were supposed to go on a safari with my family, my #1 big dream I’ve been begging for for years. We were working on some health goals and kicking major butt. We were saving for a house. I was job searching to get out of this horrible job I’m currently in.

And then I got pregnant. I got sick, tired and basically became an immobile invalid. Twins. We need somewhere to bring the twins home to…

Here we are 6 months later, and our plans and dreams have totally changed.

Things are moving so quickly, and not in the direction we expected 6 months ago.

So many decisions we’ve had to make, and still have to make. The financial burden of twins and a house is huge, but we really were left with little choice.

Times like this my belief in God is all that gets me through. I have no idea how all this is going to work out, but I know it will. We are being smart and saving and preparing for these changes as best we can.

We know that the Lord wants us to have these babies – there is just no other explanation for their conception in the first place.

And so we go on, knowing that everything will work, that He has a plan and will provide.

Love,

Brittney

Truths from Alex Boye

Alex Boye gave a devotional at the Sandy Institute. I missed it. A friend gave me an awesome re-cap, though, and this guy is seriously awesome.

One of the things that he said that I thought was cool, was he mentioned how usually the last things we think before going to bed and waking up in the morning are negative.

"I'm so exhausted" "today did not go the way I had planned" "I didn't get .... accomplished"

"I don't want to go to work today" "I'm so tired..." "today is going to be so long..."

He said that we need to make the first and last thing we think about in the day positive.

Every night and every morning, say out loud these 3 truths:

I believe I am always divinely guided

I believe that I am always going to take the correct fork in the road

I believe God will always make a way where there is no way.

Thank you,

Alex Boye!

Love,

Brittney

Come Unto Him

Today in a portfolio devotional, one of our managers gave spoke of the incident where the Disciples are on the ship, in the midst of a great storm. The Savior walks onto the water. They all call to him, to save them. Yet only one of the 11 has the faith to put one foot over the boat, into the raging storm, and walk to the Savior.


Oh, how I feel like that is my life in many ways. I’m in a little raft and the storm is raging around. I’m crying to the Savior to save me, to calm the storm and make peace once again. Yet I do not step a foot off the raft, to meet Him. What would happen if I left my fears back, and stepped into the unknown, the wild winds, and walked towards the Savior, instead of waiting for Him to do something while I sit and do nothing, where it is safe.

This relates back to a couple posts ago, when Elder Bednar spoke on being an agent, versus an object.

Love,



Brittney

Life is like one big-fat-giant-corpulent-awesome-muchly anticipated surprise!

So I love surprises. A LOT! I get as excited about surprises as children do.

In fact, to be honest, I still don't sleep much on Christmas Eve because I'm so excited about Christmas morning and all the presents and fun to be had.

A friend was mentioning my love of surprises to me the other day. And then I was thinking about an institute lesson I recently had, and one of the themes from the lesson was about how God is constantly trying us to mold us into something great, and how we need to make a correction plan for our life. To expound on that concept – there are things in life we are doing/not doing that need to be modified. Going over our life and seeing those things, and making a plan of action, a plan of correction.

The next morning on the way to work I was listening to one of my favorite talks ever, "The Infinite Power of Hope" by Elder Uchtdorf.

And suddenly all of those ideas/concepts game together.

And I thought, what if I looked at life like a surprise?

We all want something – are searching for something or working towards something. The ultimate goal is exaltation of course – but there are other steps along the way: Schooling, career, marriage, family, relationships, etc. We have hope that God is looking out for us and good things will come. But sometimes that hope is hard to hold on to, and seems like nothing more than a flimsy dream.

Well, what if I related hope to the feeling of anticipation before a surprise? Like on my birthday. I know I'm going to get surprises and I love it. What if I looked at certain events in my life like that? And instead of getting upset I don't have the present now, applying the anticipation to the power of hope. The faith of knowing something good is happening, and the hope to keep a good positive attitude.

Like a surprise!

Also on an allegorical level – you know when you have a surprise for someone and you tell them you have it? The Lord has done that for us. He's told us through personal revelation, Patriarcle blessings, Priesthood blessings, etc – that he has blessings – aka - surprises - in store for us – if we just stay strong!!

Some people when you tell them you have a present for them, but the time isn't yet – they get moody and cranky – they want the surprise NOW and don't want to wait. How pathetic that seems to us… yet we do that to the Lord ALL THE TIME! We want our surprise now and don't want to wait, don't want to ENJOY the time of anticipation (preparation) until we are ready for this great surprise.

We have a sour attitude, and as the giver – who wants to give a gift to someone who is behaving so childish? You just want to say, "I told you there is a surprise!! Just calm down and enjoy the time to prepare for this gift! Enjoy the anticipation!"

And there are so many levels of gifts… just think about the progression of gifts in your life. As we age – the gifts change. We get toys, progression in age ranges – then we start to get electronics as we are ready, and it keeps going from there. It is the same with us in the spiritual sense. As we progress spiritually, the gifts change. We never know what gift we're going to get, what the Giver thinks we could enjoy or benefit from the best. And often the gift is something we didn't even want! Or know existed. But there is always a gift that is selected specifically for us, and as we progress and grow, those gifts will progress and grow with us.

In relation to hope vs faith, which is a concept I struggle with – both practicing them and in understanding how they differ, I think in this analogy, faith would be knowing you're getting the gift. And hope would be remembering that you are getting the gift, and doing whatever you can mentally and spiritually to prepare yourself to get the gift.

Here's to all the surprises waiting for us in life, and to enjoying every second of anticipation until those gifts arrive!

 Love,
Brittney

Depths of Despair

Marilla: You must be hungry.

Anne: I can't eat. I can never eat when I'm in the depths of despair.

Marilla: The depths of despair?

Anne: Can you eat when you are that way?

Marilla: I've never been that way.

Anne: Can't you even imagine you are in the depths of despair?

Marilla: No I cannot. To despair is to turn your back on God.

(Anne of Green Gables)

Unlike Marilla, I have, at times, felt like I was in the depths of despair. All too often, I'm ashamed to admit. But how she answers this question is really profound. "No I cannot. To despair is to turn your back on God."

This teaches me a great lesson about faith. There is a quote I became familiar with some time back, and it's given me a new perspective on faith.

Worrying is a form of atheism. I don't understand people who call themselves Christian or Buddhist or Muslim or whatever and worry. Because you cannot believe in a power  greater than yourself and worry. It does not compute.

-Oprah Winfrey

I have thought about this concept often. Either I believe God loves me and is looking out for me, or I don't. How is it I cry and stress over things I know the Lord has promised me? Either I believe He will come through on His promises, or I don't.

I let my own fears and doubts completely wash away my faith in Him, in His plan, in His love.

This concept is something I've thought about a lot the last while. But it wasn't until last Tuesday, in an Institute class at the U, that the professor said something that really, really hit home. Something I've heard many times before. But, alas, never really hit home.

Learning by faith is living by faith. IT IS AN ACTION.

It is not enough to pray for more faith, or to try and think things with more faith. It is necessary to go forward in faith. 


Faith is an action.


That is my new mantra. 


From now on and forever, I will go forward with faith. I will not pray for something, and doubt and question and back-step and rethink, waiting, hoping for some divine confirmation. I'll go forward with faith, and through the action of performing faith, my faith, and my end results will be far optimum. 


Yeah, baby.


Love,
Brittney